SUCCESS:
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
STYLE:
Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.
Women somehow deteriorate during the night.
MONEY MANAGEMENT:
A man is a person who will pay two dollars for a one dollar item he wants.
A woman will pay one dollar for a two dollar item that she doesn't want.
HAPPINESS:
To be happy with a man you... [ Continue reading... ]
Men like to barbecue. Men will cook if danger is involved.
Men who have pierced ears are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.
Men who have tattoos think they have a piece of artwork on them. Yeah, like a flaming skull is art?
Men are very confident people. My husband is so confident that when he watches sports on television, he thinks that if he concentrates he can help his team. If the team is in... [ Continue reading... ]
A cockroach will live nine days without its head, before it starves to death.
A pig's orgasm lasts for 30 minutes.
A snail can sleep for three years.
All Polar bears are left-handed.
American Airlines saved $40,000 in 1987 by eliminating one olive from each salad served in first-class.
Americans on average eat 18 acres of pizza every day.
An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.
Babies are born without knee caps. They... [ Continue reading... ]
We fart. And we think it's ****ing hilarious
Girls poop. sorry boys. i know in your world we don't, but we're not the perfect little girls you want us to be
We can burp with the best of you. We just choose to keep it between us.
We probably masturbate more than you.
We love touching each other's boobs just for the hell of it. It's funny.
Kissing each other isn't a big deal. It's kind of nice.
We don't always like to give head, so... [ Continue reading... ]
