A blonde went to a flight school insisting that she wanted to learn to fly. As all the planes were currently in use, the owner agreed to instruct her by radio on how to pilot the solo helicopter. He took her out, showed her how to start it and gave her the basics, and sent her on her way.
After she climbed 1000 feet, she radioed in. "I'm doing great! I love it! The view is so beautiful, and I'm starting to get the hang of this."
After 2000... [ Continue reading... ]
It was the mailman's last day on the job after 35 years of carrying the mail through all kinds of weather to the same neighborhood.
When he arrived at the first house on his route he was greeted by the whole family there, who congratulated him and sent him on his way with a big gift envelope.
At the second house they presented him with a box of fine cigars.
The folks at the third house handed him a selection of terrific fishing... [ Continue reading... ]
It was the first time the blonde was eating Thanksgiving dinner without her family. Trying to re-enact the tradition, she prepared a dinner for herself. The next day her mother called to see how everything went.
Oh, mother, I made myself a lovely dinner, but I had so much trouble trying to eat the turkey said the daughter.
Did it not taste good her mother asked.
I don't know,the blonde said. It wouldn't sit still!
[ Continue reading... ]
The complaint letter from Blone:
We blonds at the ofise are tired of all the the dum stoopid jokes about us. We think this is hairassment. It causes us grate stress and makes our roots turn dark. We have hired a loyer and he is talking to the loyers at Clairol. We will take this all the way to the supream cort if we have two. Juj Thomas knos all about hairassment and he will be on are side.
We have also talked to the govner to make a new... [ Continue reading... ]
It was a slow afternoon at the pharmacy when Anthony, the pharmacist, saw a young, buxom blonde walk into the drugstore. The beautiful blonde sashayed up to the counter and asked Anthony, "Do you sell extra large condoms?"
The pharmacist replied, "Yes we do. Would you like to buy some?"
The blonde responds, "No sir, but do you mind if I wait around here until someone does?" [ Continue reading... ]
A blonde was summoned to court to appear as a witness in a lawsuit. The prosecutor opened his questioning with, "Where were you the night of August 24th?"
"Objection!" said the defense attorney. "Irrelevant!"
"Oh, that's okay," said the blonde from the witness stand. "I don't mind answering the question."
"I object!" the defense said again.
"No, really," said the blonde. "I'll answer."
The judge ruled: "If the witness insists on... [ Continue reading... ]
Two friends, a blonde and a redhead, are walking down the street and pass a flower shop where the redhead happens to see her boyfriend buying flowers. She sighs and says, "Oh, crap, my boyfriend is buying me flowers again....for no reason."
The blonde looks quizzically at her and says, "What's the big deal, don't you like getting flowers?"
The red head says, "Oh sure.....but he always has expectations after giving me flowers, and I just... [ Continue reading... ]
A blonde girl brought her baby boy to the doctor and told him. "Doc, my little Paddy just cries and cries all the time. What do you think the problem is?"
Taking the baby from her, the doctor noticed a strong odor, where- upon he looked into Paddy's nappy. "Why, Mary!" he exclaimed.
"The problem is that there's at least 16 pounds of yellow sh*t in your son's drawers!"
"Naw, that can't be it," the girl replied. "On the box it said "Good... [ Continue reading... ]
Two blondes were comparing their experiences at the company's annual Christmas party.
"Did you get laid, Sherry ?"
"Twice."
"Only twice?"
"Yeah, once by the band and once by the accounting department!
[ Continue reading... ]
